Advice

from teen to teen

I have a problem-- my family wants to move and I don't want to. I'll be a senior next year and I don't want to have to change schools before my senior year. I already moved after my freshman year and had to make all new friends. It was hard and I don't want to go through that again. Whidbey sounds great but not good enough. If only I could move back to California, but I don't know how to handle the move again. Last time I was so depressed that I gained weight and then people didn't want to talk to me for that also. I'm not a fat person, but people didn't understand why it was so horrible for me. I'm a great person with a great personality, and once you know me, you love me. But I moved from somewhere, where I was the most popular person of the school, to somewhere where I knew nobody. It was hard. How can I cope with moving again?

Confused

Confused,

As someone who has moved twice, I can understand how you feel. When I was in seventh grade my parents moved me to Israel. I was devastated at leaving all my friends and school. But I made new friends and was so happy that I moved there. Then at the end of the school year last year my parents told me we were moving back to the states. We ended up moving back about half an hour from where we used to live which meant I had to start in a new school where I knew noone. My best advice would be to try and meet at least one person before you move. That way you aren't just going to nothing. I knew one person before I started school, and, although that person wasn't as helpful as I would have liked, I still knew someone and I was able to say hello to them in the halls.

Also, join a youth group outside of school. I joined the Jewish youth group and became as active as I could in that. This way I have friends from outside my school that share a common interest and we get together about once a month for events.

In school I made it a point to become friends with one person from each of my classes. This served a dual purpose. Now if I'm sick or don't understand an assignment I have someone I can call for help. Also what happened was I met a girl in my first period class who was also new so we latched together and through each other we each met other people and now there is a big group that I always hang out with. know at my school they have an orientation at the beginning of the year for new students which was very nice as I got to see the school before I went, so I knew where I was going and stuff. If you are starting in the middle of the year ask the school to set you up with a buddy from the school to show you around and tell you about the school and people.

Keep in touch with all your old friends! This is probably the best thing I did! I call my friends at least once a month to talk and they call me too. I use email everyday to talk to them. Most of them are on AOL so I can actually chat with them. This is great because, especially at the beginning of the year, when I had it rough I knew I could go talk to them and they would help me through it.
Best of luck and Happy New Year! ~Rachel

write to Rachel or Confused

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